A little over a year ago, I received this text from my husband:
Do you have interest in spending spring 2025 in Spain?
I answered immediately:
Yes.
This quick and concise text exchange during one of his work meetings led to our family getting to live in southern Spain for 90 days while he taught a college course at the University of Seville. With our 9-year old and 5-year old, passports in-hand, we boarded the plane for our first time living abroad as a family.
A little over a month ago my family returned from this adventure, with many miles, photos and memories logged. It was a special experience for all of us and I could talk for days about why.
For today I want to focus on one of my main takeaways:
The power of the question: does it fit?
Our life in Spain, unsurprisingly, looked different than our time in Des Moines.
We had:
no car….and our feet to walk;
A glimpse of our walk home no huge house to clean…and a simple 2-bedroom apartment;
no more than a week’s worth of clothing….and less time spent picking outfits;
no dryer…and a roof-top clothesline;
no massages to give…and more than ample time to focus on my roles as wife and mom;
no lawn to mow, no driveway to clear, no dog to walk…and more freedom to craft our schedule as we wanted;
no school or extra-curricular activities….and a clean slate to think about what friends and activities we miss most;
no community…and space to connect just as a family, more often and more creatively.
Like emptying a drawer and taking stock of what is inside, living three months without many of the aspects of normal life shed light on what parts are most needed and most life-giving.
Does. It. Fit?
This is a question that can be applied to every aspect of life for a lifetime, constantly seeking healthy shifts and improvements.
My experience in Spain has brought that question to life, and it’s energizing to see where my answers take me.
I can tell you, so far it’s taken me on several trips to the donation center to get rid of stuff we just don’t need.
It’s also taking me on some different paths of assessment on how and where I spend my time each day and week. It feels good to simply explore some potential new routes, instead of just doing what I’ve always done just because that's what I’ve always done.
To be clear, not every day in Spain was a rosy one. There were days and even weeks that were just plain hard, especially in our adjustment period.
To be with my boys essentially every day all day was an enormous lift.
Most days, it worked. Some days it worked well. Some days, it just didn’t work at all. Even still, I wouldn’t trade a second of it.
Obviously, our time abroad was not real life and we are incredibly privileged to have been able to do it.
If we actually lived there long-term and planned to establish a sustainable existence, it would look different than our three-month stint.
However, sometimes we can’t feel motivated to change our reality until we get a dose of a different reality. A reality that truly fits.
My family may not get an opportunity like this again. While we are grateful for the experience, I have to believe that a passport isn’t needed to be able to try your life in a new way.
I wonder how your calendar, your physical space, your relationships, your energy outputs, and even your wardrobe might shift if you had the opportunity to truly sit with this question and answer it honestly.
Does. It. Fit?
My hope for all of us is that we seek and find the courage and bold beauty that comes from crafting a life that fits with our goals, our values, and our definition of a life-giving existence.
One that allows you, as Johnny Nash would say, to see clearly now.
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